The quiet liberation of being unimportant

For the longest time, I felt like I was digging in the dark.

There was no light, no end in sight—just the constant, scraping effort against an unseen wall. My hands were raw, my muscles ached, and my only thought was to keep digging.

If I stopped, what would happen? The silence felt more terrifying than the struggle.

I had a script in my head, one I believed was written by everyone else. It said: Be perfect. Be impressive. Be memorable. 

Every action was a performance for an invisible audience. I tried to be flawless because I thought it was what they expected. I polished my work until it shone, chose my words with surgical precision, and curated my life to be a highlight reel. I was living for the applause.

But a funny thing happened. I paused, looked up from my digging, and finally peeked at the audience.

And I realised… they weren't really watching.

They were busy with their own lives, their own digging, their own invisible audiences. The massive spotlight I imagined was on me was just a small lamp I had been pointing at myself. It turns out that whatever I did, they didn’t care as much as I thought. In the grand, beautiful, chaotic story of their lives, my chapter was a small one.

I wasn’t that important. Nobody cares about me.

And in that realisation, I found not insult, but the most profound liberation.

The thought that should have crushed me, set me free. If I weren't that important to them, then their expectations didn't have to be that important to me. The weight of perfection lifted. The need for applause vanished. The scraping stopped.

For the first time, I felt the freedom to just be.

I had spent so long thinking I had to become someone—something significant, something noteworthy, something worthy of a story.

This isn’t a story about giving up; it’s about letting go. It’s about understanding that everyone is the main character in their own movie. They are all working hard in their own ways, fighting their own battles, and seeking their own light.

Their journey is not a benchmark for yours. You can't compare your behind-the-scenes struggles to their highlight reel, especially when you realise they aren't comparing themselves to you, either.

You don’t have to be famous.
You don’t have to be important.
You don’t live for other people.

Stop digging for their approval and just stand up. In the quiet, unassuming freedom of being unimportant to the world, you finally have the space to be everything to yourself.

It's the moment you understand that if their expectations aren't truly about you, then you are free to be whoever you want to be—the weight lifts. The invisible chains that bound you to their opinions loosen.

For so long, we've been taught to chase after a "someone"—someone famous, important, recognised by the world. We believe we have to transform into this idealised version of ourselves to be worthy.

But the beautiful, liberating truth is this: you are already someone.

You are you.

Ain't that enough?

I hope you find this insightful. Remember:

It's not going to be easy,
But it's not impossible.

Your friend,
Brian.