I didn't want to be a "tired" adult

As I grew up, I noticed a pattern among all the adults around me.

No matter who they were, they all carried the exact same burden: they were perpetually tired.

Too tired to cook dinner.

Too tired to do something new.

Too tired to go to work.

Too tired to enjoy life.

Even too tired to rest.

Back then, I swore I’d never become like them. But looking back, I didn’t understand what was really happening.

I didn’t understand it. I thought being an adult meant having ultimate freedom. I thought it meant having fun, staying up late, and enjoying life to the fullest because nobody could tell you what to do anymore.

But then, without me even noticing it happening... I became one of them.

Some time in 2023, I realized my life had become a routine of exhaustion.

I order takeout because I don’t have the energy to chop vegetables, because I’m allergic to washing the dishes. I cancel weekend plans because the thought of leaving the house feels like a chore, I’d rather stay home and play games. I sleep late and wake up late, because I don’t want tomorrow to come.

Without realizing it, I built a life around preserving what little energy I had left.

• The food: I order takeout because I lack the energy to cook, and the thought of washing dishes makes me physically cringe.

• The social life: I cancel weekend plans because leaving the house feels like work. Staying in and playing games becomes my safe haven.

• The sleep: I push bedtime back as far as I can, staying up late and waking up late.

It isn’t because I love staying up. It’s because going to sleep means admitting today is over, and I’m simply not ready for tomorrow to start.

I didn’t realize that as adults, most of us are running on empty. And I certainly didn’t realize that I was becoming the exact tired adult I used to fear.

Why does this happen?

It happens because adulthood is... not easy.

We carry responsibilities, bills, societal expectations, and the constant, unspoken pressure to have everything “figured out.” We spend so much energy just surviving the day that by the time we get home, there is nothing left for us. Not even to have fun.

It drains our energy, and slowly, it drains our joy.

But if you are feeling this way right now, here is something you need to hear: You are not broken, and you are not failing at life just because you don’t have the energy to enjoy life 24/7. You are just carrying a lot. And if that makes you tired, that is totally normal.

But while it’s okay to be tired, we shouldn’t let the exhaustion take away who we are.

We can’t just quit being adults. We can’t drop all our responsibilities. But we can start reclaiming tiny moments of joy for ourselves, so we don’t feel entirely lost in the routine.

Read a book for ten minutes before bed. Take a walk without glancing on your phone. Do absolutely nothing on a Sunday without feeling guilty about it. For me, I like to relive my childhood memories by playing retro games from the 90s and 2000s.

You don’t have to live life to the “absolute fullest” every single day.

That is exhausting and unrealistic in itself.

So, take it easy. It’s ok to feel tired today.

But don’t forget to enjoy life in between.

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I hope you found this insightful, remember:

It’s not going to be easy
But it’s not impossible

Your friend,
Brian